Life After Divorce: 12 Ways to Rebuild Your Life
Jul 23, · Check out the tips below to take back your life after divorce. Take your time to grieve. There is no shame in that. The falling apart of a marriage will surely take a toll. You need Talk to your friends. Close ones, only. My brain switched on to the 24/7 divorce network channel after the first Estimated Reading Time: 7 mins. Jun 03, · "After my marriage ended, I doubted my ability to handle the divorce -- and definitely felt inadequate during and immediately after -- but once the dust settled, I was proud of myself for getting through it. Not only did I not fall apart, I was building a great life. I found myself on the other side and now know I can handle anything."Estimated Reading Time: 4 mins.
A study by Kingston University meant to analyze the negative impact of trauma on men and women came up with some surprising findings how to get beachy waves overnight short hair divorce and women. In the study, researchers surveyed 10, people in the U. In the survey participants were asked to rate their happiness before and after their divorce.
During a 20 year period, researchers found that women were happier and more satisfied with their lives after divorce. So, what it is about women that help them move on to a more fulfilling life how to handle life after divorce divorce? Why do women handle divorce better than men? That argument only holds water if you delve into the many reasons women file for divorce. There are many reasons women file for a divorce and not all of those reasons have anything to do with falling out of love or no longer being happy in the marriage.
She has been abandoned and left with no recourse but to file for a divorce and pursue child support via the family court system. Something that isn't taken into consideration when we read statistics about the fact that more divorces are filed by women is the reason they file for divorce.
In most situations, women file for divorce when they've been backed into a corner and feel they have no other option. Her husband suffers a midlife crisis and endangers her financial securityemotional security and behaves in a manner that is destructive to afetr and her future welfare.
Her husband is abusive and she has no recourse when protecting herself other than to file for a divorce and diborce distance between herself and the abuser. Her husband has an extra-marital affair, moves out of the marital home, in with the other woman and leaves her responsible for financial maintenance of handdle home and family. The reason for the divorce is not a factor in how well a woman will heal and move on with her life once she is divorced. Divorce can be a hard choice to make but once it is made a woman has choices she can make.
She can give into the trauma of the divorce or rebuild her life and get on with the business of living. Most choose to get on the with business of living. Women are more likely than men to seek help for the emotional trauma caused by divorced from a therapist family member or, friend. Men keep it close to the vest when dealing with emotional upheaval. Not reaching out for support prolongs their suffering and the time it aftet to heal.
Women are more likely than men to surround themselves with a positive support system such as friends and family. Women have different emotional coping how to use pegboard for tools. While men look outward when seeking comfort from emotional pain, women look divorcee. Women are less likely to turn to alcohol, drugs, new relationships and casual sex to distract them from the trauma of divorce.
Women are more likely to how to kill ants with cornmeal out new experiences after divorce, experiences that enrich their lives and give them a sense of hope for the future.
Women are more what is the name of a feather pen to prioritize their needs. They zfter put an effort into staying physically healthy during the trauma of divorce. They will have more focus on eating properly and working out in an effort to stave off illness and depression.
Women are no stronger emotionally than men. They do however use different coping skills than men when dealing with emotional trauma and, based on the study, those skills make it possible for women to move on and be happier than men after divorce.
Women have a strong sense of perseverance. Giving up is always the easy way out. Resilient people demonstrate the ability to stick to things and get them done. It's women who do the lion's share of childcare after divorce, they work outside the home while, at the same time having to keep the home together.
Women are more likely to take on, happily the challenges of single motherhood and relish in that role. Women are more likely to be comfortable in their own skin. They are more comfortable with the idea of going it alonechoosing a course of action they believe in and moving forward. Their lack of suffering from loneliness after dlvorce allows them to explore enjoyable activities either alone or in the company of friends. Cathy Meyer. Cathy Meyer is a certified divorce coach, marriage educator, freelance writer, and founding editor of DivorcedMoms.
As a divorce mediator, she provides clients with strategies and resources that enable them to power through a time of adversity. Facebook Facebook Twitter Twitter. Women Divvorce Happier After Divorce For Many Reasons, These 9 Specifically A study by Kingston University meant to analyze the negative impact of trauma on men and women came up with some surprising findings about divorce and women.
Yes, it's possible.
Jun 15, · Moving on when the grief has been expressed. 3. Finding a new community. Those who, like Melissa, reach out from their pain to get through this tough time, look back and see .
Dealing with divorce is like a scary and emotional roller coaster ride. Nobody is ever prepared for what it feels like to be divorced.
It feels like you are close to losing everything that you held to be dear. If you are battling through a divorce, this post will help you to steer your life in the right direction.
Initially, I felt like I would probably never get through this rough phase of my life. After the divorce, I became a woman who was sad, lonely and financially strapped. In short, I became the real-life Miss Havisham. There was a lot of crying during that phase. Whether I walked my dog or watched a movie, it was hard for me to accept the divorce.
As per Vikki Stark, the author of Runaway Husbands , it takes almost two years to feel normal again after the divorce.
You can heal yourself in multiple ways in those 24 months. The falling apart of a marriage will surely take a toll. You need to mourn the lifestyle and life that you have lost. Grieving will make you feel better even if it was you who wanted the split. I tried to stay strong after my divorce. It took me a while to realize that you need to let go bit by bit.
It is okay to mourn the loss. It is only through grieving that you will accept the divorce. The sooner you accept that the marriage is over, the better it will be for your mental peace. Just take your time and things will fall into place. Meanwhile, you can lie in your bed and have your favorite ice cream.
My friends helped me change that channel in my head. Almost everyone I ran into after the fallout of my marriage asked how things are after the divorce.
My best friends and support system tried their best to steer the conversations away from it. On the other hand, your friends will listen to you without judgement. They will support you and remind you how special and strong you are as a human being. Trust me; this support will help you cope with things after the divorce.
No matter how drunk or angry you are, your friends will find a way for you to vent those feelings out. They are the ones who will prevent you from falling off the edge. Friends help a lot when it comes to moving on after a divorce. But, you may need a therapist to figure out how to jump-start your new life. Sometimes, it becomes difficult to feel motivated even with friends and family around you. In that case, it helps to have a professional by your side. You can find a therapist near you on Psychology Today.
According to The Conversation, a small number of children are highly affected by the divorce of their parents. Studies show that almost 50, to 60, kids in Australia experience their parents getting a divorce each year. Your divorce can have an adverse impact on your children. Their academics may get worse, or some may even have behavioral problems. Let a professional therapist help you and your kids to deal with this matter.
As per Unified Lawyers, the global divorce rate is constantly rising with time. The rate has increased almost There are hundreds like you out there, fighting the odds to give themselves and their kids a better life.
I spent the first year of divorce grieving and venting to my family and friends. I realized it was time to stop considering myself a victim. Smart women do not make the pain of divorce their identity card. Buckle up. Start following women who can be role models with their optimism and strength.
You will be sad or feel despair at unexpected times. This step is especially important if you have a daughter who looks up to you. You need make yourself worth her admiration. I am of the opinion that economic dependence degrades the self-esteem of women.
Financial independence is one of the most important factors required to lead a better life after the divorce. Economic dependence on your husband is like a double-edged sword. Get a job or follow your passion to increase your earnings. I started by providing writing service to students in my local area. Gradually, I got a job at a reputed middle school as an English teacher. This job is not my only source of income. It is my pride, my get away from the chaos of life.
Take the example of Teri McCowan. She too had a hard time getting through the divorce after 26 years of marriage. At present, she has a walking club of her own that is doing pretty good. When you feel low, try to look at the bright side of things. You can do whatever you want. There is no one to intervene or stop you from living your dreams.
Learn to play the guitar and be a musician or go ahead and become a painter. Once you make the decision, there is no stopping you. After my divorce, I felt a little odd among my married girlfriends. The truth is, they might not like to spend all their time with you. This is why you will need new single friends.
Check out online dating sites to come across a sea of single men who would suit your taste. When you hang out with new people, you get less time to focus on painful feelings and memories.
You can learn about new friends, their lives and other experiences. However, stay away from people who tend to bring in negativity in your life. You might be vulnerable at this point in time. Start dating when you start feeling good about yourself. Do not rush with the process. Just keep it light and have loads of fun. You are not looking for a soul mate out there, are you? Find someone pleasant and go out on a dinner date.
Good luck, ladies! When things fall back into place, take a short trip with your girlfriends or kids. Nature can do wonders to your soul. I took a solo trip to Rome and it felt heavenly. The above-mentioned tips helped me live through the divorce darkness and celebrate being single.
Gracie Anderson is a high school teacher in the United States. She is a single mother who dotes on her kids. Related Content. Add A Comment Cancel reply. Follow Us on Social Media. Open toolbar.